This Earth is Not Your Home

My sweet little babes drove me crazy yesterday. I actually stopped at one point and looked in the mirror and could not believe who was staring back at me. I looked tired, worn out, and really not friendly. While trying to fix my hair (as if that would have helped) a question popped into my head,

“What am I doing?”

Why do I wake up some days and start the count down to bed time? Why did I make the many decisions I made to bring me to the point I am at? Why are these two beautifully chaotic children my beautiful responsibility? What am I doing with my life? How am I raising my children to thrive rather than just survive?

Not all days are bad. Lots of days are great. Not all moments are stressful. Lots of moments bring tears of joy and peace to my heart.

I sat down last night, as the loves of my life slept, and tried to write a little recap of what I have been learning lately, as a mother and a child of the Great King. My prayer is that this will cause you to turn your eyes to the one who longs for your heart.

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To my God who loves me so fiercely and to my children whom I love so dearly. Finding the Balance between living this life to Glorify God and also raising our next generation to see just how much we need Him. My children were entrusted to me but they are not mine. Their life is my responsibility but their hearts to do not belong to me. A hard pill for this mama to swallow.

This Earth is Not your Home

I have been told you are not mine.

They say you are on loan.

Yes, I am your mom,

But this earth is not your home.

I have been put in charge, that’s true,

but your life is not mine to rule.

Although I am training and equipping you

so you have all the tools.

My job is not to be the boss

but to seek the one who is,

making sure that we are BOTH

aware of what the real truth is.

Spending time alone each day,

listening to Him call.

Providing you with room to grow

and a net for when you fall.

I am holding on for dear life

yet learning to grip more lightly.

The world does not seem safe anymore

raising children sure is frightening.

He has called me to love you

but then says, I need to let go.

How can I do this mommy thing?

I look to Him,  I am not alone.

I have been told you are not mine.

They says you are on loan.

Although I am your mom,

This earth is not your home.

One day, if you are so blessed,

you will strike off on your own.

Making your own life choices.

Have I prepared you to be alone?

Have I shown you that you are strong

but you are also very weak.

Have I taught you who to rely on?

Have I demonstrated how to be meek?

Did I rely too much on my own strength

and not show the importance of being still?

Did my life reflect the beauty and danger

of living with free will?

Before I could stop myself,  dear child,

I gave my heart to you.

But my Lord is telling me today,

that it was a silly thing to do.

This world is but a moment.

These faces but a drop.

The relationship with Christ

is what will come out on top.

That is all that matters.

The matter of your soul.

Please hear me when I say

This earth is not your home.

Invest in your heart,

and in those hearts all around.

Your house is just a house

it can burn to the ground.

Your job is just a job

to make life feel more at ease.

Heed my advice sweet child,

Listen to me please.

I know you are not mine.

My investment is not a loan.

I give my life to show you

That this earth is not your home.

-Lioness

 

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